Why do people leaving a company feel the need to send a farewell email to everyone? Someone from our sales department (who I don't even think works on site) is leaving tomorrow. I have been here two years and I never heard of her and never laid eyes on her. So why did I get some sappy email saying goodbye and leaving me her contact information?

Now I can understand if it's the CEO, VP of the company etc. But a sales person... come on! Send an email to your department and walk out the door!

Here is an example of what someone sent out on 10/5/2008. Again, don't know her, don't care.

“What makes the desert beautiful,” says the little prince,” is that somewhere it hides a well.”

So is your love that make me strong.

Love you all and thank you all.

Ana-Maria 

WTF??

(In following examples, we will substitute the name "Ted" as the System Administrator)

• Make sure to save all your MP3 files on your network drive. No sense in wasting valuable space on your local drive! Plus, Ted loves browsing through 100+ GB of music files while he backs up the servers.
• Play with all the wires you can find. If you can't find enough, open something up to expose them. After you have finished, and nothing works anymore, put it all back together and call Ted. Deny that you touched anything and that it was working perfectly only five minutes ago. Ted just loves a good mystery. For added effect you can keep looking over his shoulder and ask what each wire is for.
• Never write down error messages. Just click OK, or restart your computer. Ted likes to guess what the error message was.
• When talking about your computer, use terms like "Thingy" and "Big Connector."
• If you get an EXE file in an email attachment, open it immediately. Ted likes to make sure the anti-virus software is working properly.
• When Ted says he coming right over, log out and go for coffee. It's no problem for him to remember your password.
• When you call Ted to have your computer moved, be sure to leave it buried under a year-old pile of postcards, baby pictures, stuffed animals, dried flowers, unpaid bills, bowling trophies and Popsicle sticks. Ted doesn't have a life, and he finds it deeply moving to catch a glimpse of yours.
• When Ted sends you an email marked as "Highly Important" or "Action Required", delete it at once. He's probably just testing some new-fangled email software.
• When Ted's eating lunch at his desk or in the lunchroom, walk right in, grab a few of his fries, then spill your guts and expect him to respond immediately. Ted lives to serve, and he's always ready to think about fixing computers, especially yours.
• When Ted's at the water cooler or outside taking a breath of fresh air, find him and ask him a computer question. The only reason he takes breaks at all is to ferret out all those employees who don't have email or a telephone.
• Send urgent email ALL IN UPPERCASE. The mail server picks it up and flags it as a rush delivery.
• When the photocopier doesn't work, call Ted. There's electronics in it, so it should be right up his alley.
• When you're getting a NO DIAL TONE message at your home computer, call Ted. He enjoys fixing telephone problems from remote locations. Especially on weekends.
• When something goes wrong with your home PC, dump it on Ted's chair the next morning with no name, no phone number, and no description of the problem. Ted just loves a good mystery.
• When you have Ted on the phone walking you through changing a setting on your PC, read the newspaper. Ted doesn't actually mean for you to DO anything. He just loves to hear himself talk.
• When your company offers training on an upcoming OS upgrade, don't bother to sign up. Ted will be there to hold your hand when the time comes.
• When the printer won't print, re-send the job 20 times in rapid succession. That should do the trick.
• When the printer still won't print after 20 tries, send the job to all the printers in the office. One of them is bound to work.
• Don't use online help. Online help is for wimps.
• Don't read the operator's manual. Manuals are for wussies.
• If you're taking night classes in computer science, feel free to demonstrate your fledgling expertise by updating the network drivers for you and all your co-workers. Ted will be grateful for the overtime when he has to stay until 2:30am fixing all of them.
• When Ted's fixing your computer at a quarter past one, eat your Whopper with cheese in his face. He functions better when he's slightly dizzy from hunger.
• When Ted asks you whether you've installed any new software on your computer, LIE. It's no one else's business what you've got on your computer.
• If the mouse cable keeps knocking down the framed picture of your dog, lift the monitor and stuff the cable under it. Those skinny Mouse cables were designed to have 55 lbs. of computer monitor crushing them.
• If the space bar on your keyboard doesn't work, blame Ted for not upgrading it sooner. Hell, it's not your fault there's a half pound of pizza crust crumbs, nail clippings, and big sticky drops of Mountain Dew under the keys.
• When you get the message saying "Are you sure?", click the "Yes" button as fast as you can. Hell, if you weren't sure, you wouldn't be doing it, would you?
• Feel perfectly free to say things like "I don't know nothing about that boneheaded computer crap." It never bothers Ted to hear his area of professional expertise referred to as boneheaded crap.
• Don't even think of breaking large print jobs down into smaller chunks. God forbid somebody else should sneak a one-page job in between your 500-page Word document.
• When you send that 500-page document to the printer, don't bother to check if the printer has enough paper. That's Ted's job.
• When Ted calls you 30 minutes later and tells you that the printer printed 24 pages of your 500-page document before it ran out of paper, and there are now nine other jobs in the queue behind yours, ask him why he didn't bother to add more paper.
• When you receive a 130 MB movie file, send it to everyone as a high-priority mail attachment. Ted's provided plenty of disk space and processor capacity on the new mail server for just those kinds of important things.
• When you bump into Ted in the grocery store on a Sunday afternoon, ask him computer questions. He works 24/7, and is always thinking about computers, even when he's at super-market buying toilet paper and doggie treats.
• If your son is a student in computer science, have him come in on the weekends and do his projects on your office computer. Ted will be there for you when your son's illegal copy of Visual Basic 6.0 makes the Access database keel over and die.
• When you bring Ted your own "no-name" brand PC to repair for free at the office, tell him how urgently he needs to fix it so you can get back to playing EverQuest. He'll get on it right away, because everyone knows he doesn't do anything all day except surf the Internet.
• Don't ever thank Ted. He loves fixing everything AND getting paid for it!

List from: http://www.sysadminday.com/time.html

I have moved my music blog to:

http://heavymetaldave.net

Here are things I have overheard in an IT department either live or via email:

• Please pull down the firewall so I may send an iPay password to an employee.
• Last week I accidentally spilled OJ on my keyboard and now they space bar is sticking... really hard to push. Can I get a replacement until mine can be cleaned.
• Help I lost my printer!
• I really apologize for this. I was unexpectedly out of the office last Thursday afternoon and all of Friday. I had some files in U:\Public that I did not transfer to a permanent location before I left. Would someone recover them for me? Of course, I can’t remember the exact file names. (NOTE: all files in our U:\Public are erased every Sunday night)
• I am traveling to Texas (from San Diego) next week. Please have a laptop available for me to use when I arrive. (NOTE: After some investigation, we found out she already has a laptop. She just did not want to carry it on the plane!!! Now that's what I call lazy!)
• What have you guys done to my computer???????????????????????????????????? (NOTE: This is all the message said. Little more explanation would have been nice.)
• Opps, I jammed my printer. Tried to fix. But failed. Please help
• Word does not work appropriately on my computer.
• My computer time to time is making horrific noise. Please check. It may be dying.

Hope you all enjoyed my talk on "Why You Need .NET Coding Standards!". Below is a link to download the presentation:

Why You Need .NET Coding Standards-ug.zip (1.48 MB)

Also, don't forget to pick up a copy of my book: VSDN Tips & Tricks .NET Coding Standards.

I was on a conference call today with two programmers from a VERY large over night shipping company. They said in passing that recently someone at at their company "lost" a laptop that contained over 15,000 customer accounts, including names and account numbers! The person no longer works there, but this brings up two issues:

1. Why do large corporations like this one allow employees to place this sensitive information on portable devices?
2. How secure are these laptops if they are stolen or "found"? I'm sure any hacker could get into the system and recover the data.

I'm sure this is a much bigger problem than most of would like to admit. I Googled this to see if it was in the news... it was not.

I hope to see you all at the 2007 San Diego Rock & Roll Code Camp coming up on June 30 - July 1.

Those of you that live in San Diego, don't forget about my UCSD Classes!

Also, don't forget to pick up a copy of my book: VSDN Tips & Tricks .NET Coding Standards, so I can buy an Intel based MAC!

Why You Need .NET Coding Standards

Why You Need .NET Coding Standards.zip (1.11 MB)

Building Rich & Interactive Web Applications with ASP.NET AJAX

Building Rich & Interactive Web Applications with ASP.NET AJAX.zip (1.61 MB)

Photo's from Code Camp below:

The reason is that I work about 4 miles from where I live in the Del Mar area. My 10 - 15 minute commute home every evening is now taking 30 - 60+ minutes! As soon as the fair is done then racing season starts... we don't get a break all summer! Fridays are really bad during racing season because of the late start and concerts.

I don't think the owners/ promoters of these events give any thought to the many thousands of people that are put out for 3 months and we get nothing out of it.

This section will tell the story of how the small company I work for (about 450+ people) was taken over by a very large company. While this happens all the time, I will focus on outsourcing because our new company takes this to a whole new level. They outsource everything and I mean everything from IT, accounting, HR, recruiting, facilities and more. I’m not sure who even works at the home office? Okay maybe the VP’s and the project managers that oversee the outsourcing, but that’s about it. I have never seen an abuse of outsourcing as I have witnessed since they purchased us. I could care less if it worked, but it doesn’t from what I have seen so far.

I have never seen a bigger waste of time and money. Sure, outsourcing on the surface might be cheaper but it takes about 5 outsourced people to do the job of one of us! I will for now not reveal the company that purchased the company I work for but I might use real first names.

Stay tuned!

ABC News reported this morning about the dangers of text messaging while driving and that Washington will be the first state to make it illegal. This got me thinking on why we need laws for issues that should be common sense to people? This is obviously a very dangerous habit that seems to be common among young people since this is their main method of communication.

They also reported a news story about a bus driver that crashed a bus while text messaging and injured 30 children including one child lost her hand.  Should we have an IQ test before handing out cell phones? Well, my boss who is very intelligent does this all the time. He did it once with me in the car and I was very scared. He also sends me email from his Blackberry while driving his entire family in an SUV!

If we need legislation because so many people are clueless, why does it take so long? Why isn’t this banned country wide? Actually, in my mind, cell phone and hand-held devices should be totally banned from cars. When I sit an intersection watching cars go by, I see about 50% of people talking on their cell phones with it up to their ear (not using hands free).  There is no phone call, text message or email that is worth endangering your life or others.  How many lives have to be loss to this activity?

The Solution

Since people are addicted to their phones and messaging and no matter how much legislation you throw at them, it will keep happening. So what is the solution? I thought of an easy one… make a law that if a cell phone detects that it’s traveling more than three miles an hour (via the internal GPS), disable it! No reading messages, no dialing and no receiving calls.

Double CD and Double DVD Featuring the Full Theatrical Performance of Operation: Mindcrime I and II Are Both Available From Rhino June 26

LOS ANGELES — Queensrÿche brought the group’s acclaimed Operation: mindcrime albums to the stage last year performing the original and its 2006 sequel in their entirety during the group’s successful North American tour. The marathon shows included a full theatrical production complete with surround sound, video imagery and actors portraying the concept albums’ characters onstage with the band. Rhino captures Queensrÿche’s epic performance in front of the quintet’s hometown crowd at the Moore Theater in Seattle with MINDCRIME AT THE MOORE. The double CD ($24.98) and double DVD ($29.99) versions will both be available June 26 at all physical retail outlets and www.rhino.com. The album will also be available at all digital retail outlets for a suggested retail price of $14.99. An iTunes exclusive version featuring a video of “The Chase” with Ronnie James Dio will be available for $15.99.

The CD includes singer and chief songwriter Geoff Tate along with guitarists Michael Wilton and Mike Stone, bassist Eddie Jackson and drummer Scott Rockenfield performing all 32 mindcrime tracks plus a two-song encore featuring their signature hits—“Jet City Woman” and “Walk In The Shadows.” The DVD features the same performance expanded with bonus material including a tour documentary, a featurette on the band’s “Rock & Ride Across America” charity motorcycle ride for the VH1 Save The Music Foundation, and a live performance of “The Chase” from the Gibson Amphitheatre in Los Angeles, featuring Ronnie James Dio’s only public appearance as Dr. X.

“This concert is the realization of an idea that began nearly two decades ago,” says Tate. “The story and music of Operation: mindcrime is very dear to the band. We are thrilled with this performance and proud to share it with our audience.”

Queensrÿche released Operation: mindcrime in 1988. Praised by critics and certified platinum, the album was an acclaimed success remaining on Billboard’s Top 200 for more than a year. In 2006 the band released a long-awaited sequel to their magnum opus to critical and commercial success. The album debuted at #14 on the Top 200, their highest debut in over a decade.

The concept albums follow an intriguing and complex plot that revolves around Dr. X, a political puppet master who brainwashes Nikki—the story’s main character—to assassinate corrupt public figures. The story also includes Nikki’s lover, Sister Mary. A former teenage prostitute who becomes a nun, Sister Mary is murdered mysteriously, leaving the cliffhanger “Who Killed Sister Mary?” Set 20 years after the original, Operation: mindcrime II explores Nikki’s fate after being released from prison and reveals the identity of Mary’s killer. The album centers on revenge and what it does to people, their emotions and the choices they make.

MINDCRIME AT THE MOORE
Disc 1
1. “I Remember Now”
2. “Anarchy-X”
3. “Revolution Calling”
4. “Operation: Mindcrime”
5. “Speak”
6. “Spreading The Disease”
7. “The Mission”
8. “Suite Sister Mary”
9. “The Needle Lies”
10. “Electric Requiem”
11. “Breaking The Silence”
12. “I Don’t Believe In Love”
13. “Waiting For 22”
14. “My Empty Room”
15. “Eyes Of A Stranger”

Disc 2
1. “Freiheit Ouvertüre”
2. “Convict”
3. “I’m American”
4. “One Foot In Hell”
5. “Hostage”
6. “The Hands”
7. “Speed Of Light”
8. “Signs Say Go”
9. “Re-Arrange You”
10. “The Chase”
11. “Murderer?”
12. “Circles”
13. “If I Could Change It All”
14. “An Intentional Confrontation”
15. “A Junkie’s Blues”
16. “Fear City Slide”
17. “All The Promises”
Encore
18. “Walk In The Shadows”
19. “Jet City Woman”

Bonus DVD Content
-Tour Documentary
-“The Chase” performed live with Ronnie James Dio in Los Angeles
-Queensryche Rock & Ride featurette

Okay, I'm not... but I am tired of hearing about this! So I decided to do something about it. Check out my new web site:

http:\\ImAnnaNicolesBabysFather.com

You too can register as the "real" father of the baby and see a map of the world to see where her donor tour went (coming soon). Wonder what country will win? You can get your very own I'm Anna Nicole's Baby's Father swag and let the world know that you are the true father!

Want to see what's coming in the next version of Visual Studio? Check out what Scott Guthrie has to say:

http://weblogs.asp.net/scottgu/archive/2007/02/08/my-first-look-at-orcas-presentation.aspx

One week ago today, Microsoft officially released ASP.NET 2.0 Ajax. This includes the core components (Extensions), the ASP.NET AJAX Control Toolkit and Futures January CTP. If you have been using an older version of this software or are new, I might hold off installing the official release! For a week now I have been finding nothing but bugs and issues with things that worked in the previous release but now are broken. I will keep adding to this post, but here is the first and major issues that I am seeing:

UpdatePanel and a Simple Trigger

One of the simplest bugs to reproduce is a trigger in the UpdatePanel. The code below shows an TextBox that is configured to cause a postback on the UpdatePanel when you press return. The code below works just fine.

<form id="form1" runat="server">
        <div>
            <asp:ScriptManager ID="SM" runat="server">
            </asp:ScriptManager>
            <asp:TextBox ID="TextBox1" runat="server"></asp:TextBox>
            <asp:UpdatePanel ID="UpdatePanel1" runat="server" UpdateMode="Conditional">
                <ContentTemplate>

                    Time:
                    <%= datetime.Now.ToString() %>
                </ContentTemplate>
                <Triggers>
                    <asp:AsyncPostBackTrigger ControlID="TextBox1" />
                </Triggers>
            </asp:UpdatePanel>
        </div>
    </form>

Simply add a TextBox to the ContentTemplate and the trigger no longer works!!!!

More To Come

I'm also having issues with ValidatorCalloutExtender inside of an ItemTempate, AutoCompleteExtender inside of an UpdatePanel and more. All worked 8 days ago!

Also, if you have already started an Ajax site before version 1.0 there are major migration issues with the web.config. In previous updates you could simply copy the web.config from a new 'AJAX Enabled Web Site'. For some reason, this no longer works. The only way I could get my sites working with 1.0, is to create a new AJAX site, and copy all of my code over to the new project. Go figure.

If you read the install requirements, they 'strongly' recommend installing SP1 of Visual Studio. Make sure you have something to do during this process. Depending on what machine I was updating it took anywhere from 1 to 3 hours!

I hope you all enjoyed the SoCal Rock & Roll Code Camp 2007 as much as I did. As promised, below are my slides and sample code. Those of you that live in San Diego, don't forget about my AJAX class at UCSD next semester that starts in May.

Also, don't forget to pick up a copy of my book: VSDN Tips & Tricks .NET Coding Standards, so I can buy an Intel based MAC

Why You Need .NET Coding Standards

NET Coding Standards & Best Practices200701.zip (329.65 KB) (slides)

Programming AJAX with the ASP.NET AJAX Control Toolkit

Programming AJAX with ASP.NET AJAX200701.zip (393.22 KB) (slides)

AjaxExample200701.zip (523.38 KB) (code)

See you next year!